Detours + Shortcuts

I sat stunned on the cool leather couch, letting the words reverberate through me…

“Mark my words…this shortcut will haunt you!”

At first glance, the movie is ridiculous, crude, and…well…ridiculous and crude.

I rolled my eyes constantly when I saw it in 2008, which is, non-coincidentally, the year that I stepped into the world of self-development as a student and a trainer.

But this time…it was different…

This time, it was about…

1) Me as a MessagePreneur (whose sole intention is LOVE)…

2) And about a Guru/Expert/Self-Empowerment Industry that, in my experience over the last 7 years, has failed (in so many cases) to keep the LOVE and EMPOWERMENT it preaches and promises at its core…

3) And about my clients, who (like a darn mama hen) I pray for diligently, as they step into the industry and face numerous opportunities to avoid detours and take shortcuts.

Let me explain. 


First, there are the Detours…

You’re inspired to go _______________ (insert vision, goal, cause).

You’re ___________________ (insert happy emotion) to get there.

You’ve got a date with destiny @ ___________________ (insert your deadline).

You’ve downloaded the directions/steps _____________ (insert strategy) to get there.

You’ve packed everything you need for the trip ________ (insert your current set of tools, skills, and strategies).


And then you start to see orange cones and your heart begins to race.
Oh no, I’m not going to get there on time!

You glance in all of your mirrors, looking to see if you can maneuver on to another street before you get totally delayed. OMG, there’s road construction on this street too?

But you know the lay of the land around these parts, so you turn on to another street.
Wth? Is the entire world under construction right now?

Your adrenaline coursing through your body, your palms sweaty, you rack your mind for any other route to get to your destination. Oh no. I’m not going to make it in time.


And then you have a choice.

You can go home and try again another day.
Let’s be real here…road construction lasts FOREVER!!! 

Or you can take the Detour…maybe see some landmarks you’ve never seen, maybe smile at a park you used to play at in your childhood, maybe just use the time to take some deep breaths and think about stuff…


Stuff Like…

This destination… is it really MINE? Or is this someone else’s story/script for me?

This feeling of excitement… is it because my soul has been aching for this, or is it because this goal is a nice distraction from what I really need to be focusing on?

This deadline… is it reasonable? What will I have to sacrifice? Am I willing to do that?

This strategy I downloaded… is it really a one-size-fits-all, or do I need to customize this for my particular vision?

These tools, skills, and strategies… are they enough to get me where I want to go, or do I need to find some more along this Detour?


These Detours are what we, at True to Intention, call Upside-Downs.

It LOOKS LIKE life is falling apart – the deadline isn’t going to be reached,
the relationships are coming unglued, the businesses begin to teeter,
or there is a health crisis.

BUT IT CAN BE – and I would go so far as to say that IT IS A DIVINE INVITATION,
if you let it be, to take a few deep breaths,
ask yourself some really important questions,
and restore congruence and well-being wherever…
to get yourself on to the road that is really going to take you
where your heart really wants to go.


And then, there are the Shortcuts…

You’re inspired to go _______________ (insert vision, goal, cause).

You’re ___________________ (insert happy emotion) to get there.

You’ve got a date with destiny @ ___________________ (insert your deadline).

You’ve downloaded the directions/steps _____________ (insert strategy) to get there.

You’ve packed everything you need for the trip ________ (insert your current set of tools, skills, and strategies).

You pick up a friend (or a coach) on your way because, let’s face it, it’s waaaaay more fun and convenient to carpool to our destinations.

And then you hear it, “Oh, why are you taking THIS route? This takes so much longer than THIS one? Let me show you. Take a right here, and then…”

A shortcut? Well, I don’t know. I was kinda excited about my route…

But…I guess…if I can get there even faster and with less muss and fuss.

You make the turn and continue to follow her directions.

And you start chatting about other stuff while she gives you cues to turn here and there.

After a little while, your stomach starts to turn, your palms get sweaty, and your heart whispers, “This isn’t right.”

Where was I going in the first place? You glance over at your co-pilot and wonder why you listened to her? But how the hell are you going to find your way back to the beginning now? So, you keep going.

And then all of a sudden, you arrive at your destination, as if your co-pilot wiggled her nose and made it appear.

Before you step out of the car, you notice that your gas tank is on Empty.

How strange…it was supposed to be a shortcut…?

You step out of the car, glad to be there, but feeling all kinds of stressed out and wrong.

You notice that you feel full and fat, because you were nervously eating through the entire lunch you packed while you were driving and talking.

You glance at your car as you walk to the trunk to grab your stuff, and notice that your paint is chipping off, you have a dent that you swear wasn’t there before, and one of the tires is unusually low…

That was supposed to be a shortcut?

I’m here, but…was it worth it?



The Love Guru’s goal is to share his message of Love…
AND to become the #1 Guru in his industry.


And he had two people on his team:

  • a devotee, name Rajneesh, who waited on his every need and deeply believed in the Guru’s message and work



  • a business executive, who was responsible for the business – the money, the publicity, and executing “the route to get to Oprah and become the #1 Guru.”


At one point, the business executive says, “All you need to do is _____, and you’ll get to Oprah.” And the guru agrees, even though it means that he takes a shortcut through the last two phases of his 5-Step Transformation Plan with a client.

Appalled, Rajneesh says, “Mark my words, Your Holiness, this shortcut will haunt you!”

Two years ago, my goal was to share my message of LOVE…

AND to take my business to the next level.


And I had two voices in my head:

  • my soul, whose one goal is LOVE and to live that message out


  • my business mind (that was developed by other coaches, gurus, and experts over the years), whose one goal was to take my business to the next level because, after the book, “I had everything in place to begin to dominate in my niche.”


I remember looking at my projections in the Spring of 2013, after the big Bestseller and Transformational Retreat Weekend Success, and right when the normal upside-down stuff started to happen – relationship come-apart, big business problems, energy drama, etc.

The business mind said, “This is what you have to do…It’s what you’ve always done…”

And my soul said, “Ugh…”


The Vision was beautiful!
I got excited every time I thought about helping that many people.
The deadline was totally doable.
I had the shortcuts, strategies, and coaches who had helped me get to the current summit.
And I had just proven that all of my tools, skills, and strategies WORK WITH VELOCITY.

So, what was it?

Well, like the LOVE GURU, I had to LIVE MY MESSAGE and WORK THE PROCESS THAT I HAVE BEEN GIVEN – ago upside-down, shed the fuzzies (old beliefs), heal and rewrite the stories, and strengthen my wings for the next flight.

My soul said, “That shortcut will haunt you. Take the Detour in front of you. It will take longer, but it will be okay.”

I knew, in the deepest part of my soul, that if I took the shortcut in front of me – even though I couldn’t see what wasn’t working in the moment – I was going to end up some place I did not want to be…

Lost in the boonies, trying to find my way back home…


I could have gotten to my destination at the cost of my soul’s deepest desires…

On empty…

Feeling bloated, stressed, and all wrong…

With dings, dents, and depressed tires that – let’s be honest – wouldn’t have been able to help me get to the next summit…

Haunted by the shortcut, especially because I now have people ‘watching me’ as a leader, a CEO, a coach…

Sigh…Thank heavens for Detours…